Posts Tagged ‘Role of Fathers’
Monday, November 8th, 2010
Students at The Goddard School® located in Charlotte, NC, benefit from added safety measures like door hinge guards.
fingersafe® produces door hinge guards that prevent children’s fingers from being pinched or crushed at the hinged end of doors.
The unique accordion shape of the fingersafe® door hinge ejects fingers from the opening area.
- fingersafe® has been installed in restaurants, hospitals, schools, homes and government facilities throughout North America and Europe.
- Joe Kaplan, of the Greater Los Angeles Chapter-National Safety Council has described fingersafe® as, “The best new safety product to hit America in 50 years.”*
To learn more about The Goddard School, click here.
Tags: 28277, 5 Star Child Care Centers, 5 star Preschools in Charlotte, Add new tag, Back To School, Charlotte Preschools, Child Care Ballantyne, Child Care Centers Ballantyne, Child Care Centers Charlotte, Child Care Centers in Ballantyne, Child Care Centers in Charlotte, Child Care Charlotte, Child Development, Child Vacations, Goddard School, New School, Role of Fathers
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Monday, November 1st, 2010
by Kyle D. Pruett, M.D
One of the principal behavior changes of American parents in the last generation centers on the wish that fathers be more involved day-to-day with their children. My research on the issue of whether or not this is a good thing comes to two firm conclusions: 1) children raised by involved dads are thriving, healthy kids, and 2) fathers do not mother any more than mothers father.
So, what is unique about the way men parent, and does it matter to children?
Fathers roughhouse with their kids right from the beginning more than mothers. This is interesting to children, they respond to it, and even seek it out. It helps to build physical confidence in boys and girls.
- Fathers allow frustration to build to elevated levels before intervening when their children are mastering something new. It turns out that dads think this helps children learn to handle frustration at manageable levels – preparing them for life’s uneven playing field. They are right.
- Fathers may give their children more leeway in new circumstances while mothers tend to stay physically closer to their children in the park or at the mall. Dads want children to explore. Children tend to like it, and learn independence from it.
- Fathers use more real-world consequences to discipline whereas mothers use more social-relationship consequences. Children who receive both integrate them well, giving them a stronger sense of internal control and self-discipline than children with uninvolved or absent dads.
- Kids with involved dads – dads who have fed, changed diapered, bathed, and comforted (with the support of their spouses) – do better in school, have higher self-confidence, use less violent problem-solving themselves, and have stronger verbal skills.
Children can distinguish the voice of their father from their mother at birth – and their handling styles at six weeks. Any questions? Just ask the kids what they think of fathering.
Kyle D. Pruett, M.D. is an advisor for The Goddard School®. Dr. Pruett is an authority on child development who has been practicing child and family psychiatry for over twenty-five years. He is a clinical professor of child psychiatry at Yale University’s Child Study Center.
To learn more about The Goddard School, click here.
Tags: 5 Star Child Care Centers, 5 star Preschools in Charlotte, Back To School, boredom, Charlotte Preschools, Child Care Ballantyne, Child Care Centers Ballantyne, Child Development, Choosing a Preschool, Fun in the Sun, Goddard School, New School, Role of Fathers, The Goddard School, Transitions
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Wednesday, October 27th, 2010
by Dr Kyle Pruett
Growing up is heady stuff for kids. So sleep problems are not uncommon. If your child routinely has trouble getting to sleep or wakes up at night and needs comforting, his developmental achievements give you some important new tools to work with at this age.
Dr. Minde reminds parents of the importance of routine in the daily life of a child. At an age when children are learning so much so fast, predictability and regularity in the timing and location of meals, bathing, and bedtimes is soothing and comforting. In today’s environment of working parents, such routines may be harder to provide, but they are no less important to the child.
He encourages parents to use quiet bedtime rituals to ease the transition. Bedtime stories are a proven staple, as are songs and prayers. But you can personalize the routine and periodically update it to match you child’s special interests, such as helping him put his favorite stuffed animal or doll to bed.
When the child cries, he recommends that the parents check on the child every five to ten minutes (whatever time frame is tolerable for the parent), perhaps patting and reassuring the child, but making it clear that the child is expected to stay in bed. If necessary, he recommends that the parent withdraw from the room in stages, first sitting on the bed, then in a nearby chair.
If problems persist, Dr. Minde suggests that you enlist your child’s help. You can put your child’s growing language and imaginative powers, as well as his growing independence, to work on the case. Explain that you need your sleep, and ask your child what would help him to stay clam when he wakes and to get back to sleep on his own. Perhaps holding and talking to his favorite teddy bear or snuggling with his favorite blanket. Make sure these items are within easy reach at bedtime.
To learn more about The Goddard School, click here.
Tags: 28277, 5 Star Child Care Centers, Back To School, Ballantyne, Biting, boredom, car, Charlotte Preschools, Child Care Ballantyne, Child Care Centers Charlotte, Fun in the Sun, Goddard School, Phonics, Role of Fathers, Saving Money, South Charlotte, The Goddard School
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Wednesday, September 22nd, 2010
by Dr. Kyle Pruett
Parental and marital burnout is a common fellow traveler at the end of the third parental year. It should not be ignored, any more than a lump or a polyp. And it is just as important that you fix it while it is still benign.
It seems to show up now because we finally let ourselves relax a bit, having gotten our kids talking, potty-trained (or at least started), loving and human enough to believe they will at least have a life. But that’s when we often begin wondering about our own life, sometimes for the first time in years.
Research on family development shows that marital satisfaction can get perilously low early in the lives of kids because they seem to be such huge energy sinks. Thoughts of “Are-we-having-fun-yet?” guiltily badger mothers and fathers, especially if they keep these thoughts to themselves. If you are not enjoying parenting, it may mean that you are working too hard at it. You may be allowing yourself no savor time because you are too busy whipping the process of development into a frenzy. My father’s favorite relevant quote: “Trying to teach a pig to sing is just a waste of time. It frustrates the farmer and really irritates the pig.” Return to being a parent, not a driver, and let your child return to growing instead of balking.
As for the marriage or partnership that spawned this child, it, too, is usually nurtured by a heart-mind connection that requires periodic preventive and reparative maintenance. The three-year or 36,000-mile (stairs, chasing, cruise & snooze, shopping) check-up is critical for long-term endurance, because if that machine isn’t purring along, the wheels are going to eventually come off, given the road conditions ahead.
Take time to be together and uncover who you are as adults with minds, opinions, ideas, hobbies, yearnings and dreams. Date, overnight away, lunch, whatever. Pay someone else to feed or entertain you for a change, to reverse the energy flow. Replenishing affection between adults takes conscious effort. Childcare involves so much touching, holding, carrying, bathing and comforting that adult affection can simply get crowded out of a relationship. But the replenishment of that affectional and intellectual tie between the adults will be especially important in the years to come when the older school-age child wouldn’t get caught dead kissing a parent on the cheek, much less discuss the idea!
Bottom line: you’ll be fine. Meanwhile, celebrate how far you’ve come together, and whom you have uniquely become together. These have been golden years to savor and adore. None of us would amount to anything without each other, and these early parenting years show better than any others.
To learn more about The Goddard School, click here.
Tags: 28277, 5 Star Child Care Centers, 5 star Preschools in Charlotte, 5-star Preschools, Back To School, Biting, boredom, Charlotte Preschools, Child Care Ballantyne, Child Care Centers Ballantyne, Child Care Centers Charlotte, Child Care Charlotte, Goddard School, New Place, Role of Fathers, Saving Money, The Goddard School, The Goddard Schoolol, Worrying in Children
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Wednesday, September 15th, 2010
Your experience as a sibling counts hugely in perpetually shaping and re-shaping your own perspectives and judgments (positive and negative) about how not to get stung in this hornet’s nest of competing interests, needs, and abilities.
I’m the middle of three sons, and have dozens of cousins. Several of them have special needs, but most don’t. I recall a riveting exchange from an Oklahoma Thanksgiving decades back where my loving (but daunting) grandmother chided one of her 7 year-old grandchildren for ‘cruelly teasing’ his sister; “Craig – you just can’t be that harsh with her. It’s your job to compromise – adjust yourself accordingly!”
He glared fiercely at her, went very still for a moment, and then burst into tears –“Yea, like I have choice. I’ve adjusted every day of my life for her!” and ran outside, seeking his comfort with the presumably less judgmental barn animals.
How many hours had Craig waited in waiting rooms while his sister received care? How many conversations had he overheard between his parents about her needs, compared to the ones they’d had about his? He loved her unconditionally, was incredibly proud of her, and protected her from insensitive peers. But wasn’t he entitled to think she could be a pain sometimes – just like all other sibling pairs from time immemorial? Couldn’t he not always have to try extra hard to make his parents proud of him since they worried so often about his sister? Couldn’t they talk to him about what was the matter with her and if she’d ever be normal?
These are the things that siblings of children with special needs struggle with every day, and here are some ideas about how to help them keep their balance (not to mention yours):
Let them know that you expect them to have many complicated feelings about their sibling, some loving and some not; and that you are open to listening without making them feel bad about it. They are feelings, after all, not explosives, and ambivalence is a thread woven into every relationship.
- Avoid setting unrealistically high standards – emotional, social, spiritual, moral, athletic or academic. They are just who they are, not compensations for who they are not.
- Expect them to reach their limit periodically (just like yourself), and try to avoid shaming them when they do. They need diversion and recovery time at such moments, not sermons. Guilt about ‘being normal’ is nearly universal in such children; making the sermons at such moments a kind of double-whammy of shame.
- Nothing is more effective than mutually gratifying time alone with you, although careful listening is its equally effective clone.
- As children develop, their understandings (and their worries) get more complex, so have periodic check-ins with them about their (ever-changing) questions about what is ‘the matter’ with and future for their sibling.
To learn more about The Goddard School, click here.
Tags: 5 Star Child Care Centers, 5-star Preschools, Add new tag, Biting, car, Child Care Ballantyne, Child Care Centers Ballantyne, Child Care Centers in Ballantyne, Child Care Centers in Charlotte, Child Vacations, Choosing a Preschool, Controlling Worrying in children, Day Care Center Ballantyne, Day Care School, Goddard, New Place, Phonics, Role of Fathers, Staying Cool, The Goddard School, Worrying in Children
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Friday, August 20th, 2010
by Kyle D. Pruett, M.D.
Children’s sleep issues are among the more challenging developmental stages for parents to master. But biology is on the parents’ side in this one, because sleep patterns mature over time just like other developmental skills.
Polls tell us that one-third of American children and their parents sleep together some or most of the time before children start school. Co-sleeping varies hugely by culture and ethnicity. So think about what you want to do, and discuss the pros and cons with your pediatrician.
- Make sure your crib is safe (locking rails), that your older child’s ‘big bed’ has side rails, and if you are co-sleeping, that there is plenty of room.
- The human brain is active during sleep, but the deepest sleep is typically at the beginning of the night. Babies spend more time than older children in stimulating REM sleep, with eye movements and irregular breathing. Don’t worry about all that action in your child’s body – it too is growth.
- Start them young – do not ignore the importance of naps, watch for the yawn, and start bedtime early in the evening.
- The transition from crib to bed is also a time of sleep pattern changes, but most kids want it to work.
- To instill good sleep habits remember that consistency matters so much:
- Bath Time
- Goodnights
- Tuck and Talk Bedtime Story
- Lullabye (yours are best)
- Goodnights
This all sounds well and good, but it is a rare family that hasn’t had to handle some sleep trouble along the way. If your family is trying to re-establish a lapsed routine, stay calm and reassuring. We almost all need more sleep than we get, and it is a tremendous gift to our children to teach them how to sleep well.
Suggested Resource: American Academy of Pediatrics http://www.aap.org
Kyle D. Pruett, M.D. is an advisor for The Goddard School®. Dr. Pruett is an authority on child development who has been practicing child and family psychiatry for over twenty-five years. He is a clinical professor of child psychiatry at Yale University’s Child Study Center.
To learn more about The Goddard School, click here.
Tags: 28277, 5 Star Child Care Centers, 5 star Preschools in Charlotte, Back To School, Biting, boredom, Charlotte Preschools, Child Care Charlotte, Controlling Worrying in children, Fun in the Sun, Literacy, New School, Pacifier, Phonics, Role of Fathers, Sleeping, Staying Cool, Sun Protection, The Goddard School, Thumbsucking, Traveling Children
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Monday, August 16th, 2010
Parents can help make the “back to school” transition much smoother for their child if they prepare in advance. Try to add activities or planned outings to your child’s day. This structure helps prepare them to be on a schedule when they return to the classroom. If the child will be going to a new school, parents may want to schedule a visit with their child before the first day. Consider taking your child on a fun shopping trip where they can help pick out their clothes, lunchbox and supplies.
Ensuring your child has adequate sleep and proper nutrition is very important. Your child will do their best if they get to sleep early and eat a healthy breakfast each day before school. A daily diet of junk food is not compatible with learning. It can cause listlessness and hyperactivity which can impair a child’s ability to learn. Skipping breakfast especially is a detriment to a child’s education.
Adjust your child’s sleep schedule a few weeks in advance to help avoid struggling to get them out of bed for school. Set up a consistent daily routine so that your child wakes up and goes to sleep at the same times each day. If you have not created one already, start a bedtime routine, including bathing, selecting clothes for the next day, cuddling together for a bedtime story and a kiss goodnight. Begin a regular morning routine that includes a healthy breakfast, packing a nutritious lunch, grooming and getting dressed for the day.
To learn more about The Goddard School, click here.
Tags: 5 Star Child Care Centers, 5 star Preschools in Charlotte, Add new tag, Back To School, Child Care Ballantyne, Child Care Centers Ballantyne, Child Development, Choosing a Preschool, Fun in the Sun, Goddard School Ballantyne, Learning through Play, Literacy, New School, Phonics, Role of Fathers, Saving Money, Sleeping, The Goddard School, water Play, Worrying in Children
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Wednesday, August 4th, 2010
STAY-CATIONS: Back-to-Basics Family Fun!
Stay-cations may not only provide a more frugal family vacation, they may also provide an opportunity to create and experience a higher level of bonding with your children.
Upsides to stay-cations include nominal packing as well as minimal airplane or car ride entertainment. Stay-cations, however, provide the challenge of getting into vacation mode when the remnants of your day-to-day life are all around – planning ahead is the key.
Fun, frugal stay-cations include:
- Go on nature walks, hikes and bike rides. Collect rocks to paint.
- Organize day trips to zoos and/or museums. Create a family scrapbook to commemorate your experiences.
- Choose a miniature golf outing and enjoy a little healthy competition.
- Plan a family mini-spa day. Prepare a healthy lunch from your vegetable garden.
- Go camping in your own backyard. Don’t forget flashlight tag and S’mores!
- Plan and prepare yummy goodies and enjoy a picnic together in a local park.
- Rainy day stay-cations are fun too!
- Play board games
- Assemble jigsaw puzzles
- Watch family movies
To learn more about The Goddard School, click here.
Tags: 5 Star Child Care Centers, 5 star Preschools in Charlotte, 5-star Preschools, Add new tag, Back To School, Charlotte Preschools, Child Care Ballantyne, Child Care Centers Ballantyne, Child Care Centers Charlotte, Child Care Centers in Ballantyne, Child Care Centers in Charlotte, Controlling Worrying in children, Goddard School, Learning through Play, New School, Phonics, Role of Fathers, The Goddard School, The Goddard School-Ballantyne, Worrying in Children
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Find ways to involve your children in the richness of your ‘grown-up’ life. Be creative and patient because the results are worth your effort!
For young children, play is a lot more than entertainment. It is central to their development. A wonderful way to play with and teach children is to bring them into your world, where ‘real-life’ happens. Children love to do ‘grown-up’ things and to imitate you. And when they contribute, they see themselves as players and get a well-earned self-esteem boost!
Children also learn about important values and concepts from watching you. They see the result of practice and perseverance, and they come to know that learning is a lifelong process. They see that everyone, even a grown-up, can make mistakes and can learn from them.
There are two easy and enjoyable ways for your children to play in the grown-up world: you can let them help with your chores and you can include them in your favorite pastimes.
Work as play: Include your children in your household routine. There are countless safe ways for children to help with meals, laundry, shopping or cleaning. They can help mix recipe ingredients, pick fruit at the grocery store, water the garden or pack their lunch. These activities are fun learning experiences, especially if you are teaching informally along the way. The chores may take a little longer as they learn the ropes, make mistakes, and work at a snail’s pace, but the value for their learning and their self-regard are more than worth the extra time.
Hobbies and pastimes: Share your interests with your children. This is one of the most intriguing, emotionally rich forms of learning that children can receive. Teach your children about your avocations, and keep up with your piano, chess, painting, hiking or gardening. Your enthusiasm for your hobbies will be infectious and offer many ways for your children to learn and develop skills.
Kyle D. Pruett, M.D., is an advisor for The Goddard School®. Dr. Pruett is an authority on child development who has been practicing child and family psychiatry for over twenty-five years. He is a clinical professor of child psychiatry at Yale University’s Child Study Center.
To learn more about The Goddard School, click here.
Tags: 28277, 5 Star Child Care Centers, 5 star Preschools in Charlotte, Add new tag, Biting, boredom, Charlotte Preschools, Child Care Centers Charlotte, Child Care Centers in Ballantyne, Child Care Charlotte, Choosing a Preschool, Controlling Worrying in children, Fun in the Sun, Goddard School, Learning through Play, Pacifier, Role of Fathers, The Goddard School
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As a (former) pediatrician and child psychiatrist for three decades, I increasingly respect the significance of children’s fears in shaping our shared everyday lives. Inconvenient though fears of the dark, animals, water, and monsters may be, they are meaningful clues about what children are trying to master about their world.
Worries all mean something, and we let our children down when we ignore and belittle, not to mention waste opportunities to master, so let’s spend a minute to understand them better:
- Fears appear like clockwork in childhood. The adrenalin fears stimulate heightens learning of vital lessons, like when to run in the face of real danger, when to cry for help, and eventually to distinguish what is really dangerous (speeding cars) from what is not (family dog).
- Fears only seem to emerge ‘from nowhere.’ Actually, they typically surface during periods of accelerated development – when children lose their old equilibrium while looking for a new one. Actively toilet- learning toddlers are often more afraid of the dark than before or after they get the potty thing solved.
- Stranger anxiety begins when children start to crawl around and need to be more aware of who knows them and who doesn’t.
- Other common fears which emerge and fade with predictability during preschool years may be insects, animals, loud noises, the dark (and its imagined inhabitants – monsters, witches, ghosts), high places, and parental loss to name a few.
Listen thoughtfully to your children as they describe their fear. Their fears have their reasons, though they may not be instantly clear to you. Reassure your children that you’ll help them feel better- get your flashlight out and check under their bed. Cuddle them a little extra during such times, and let them slip back toward babyhood a little. Finally, when children work it out, remind them that they worked it out. This will help them as new fears emerge.
by Kyle D. Pruett, M.D
Suggested resource: American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry website www.aacap.org
To learn more about The Goddard School, click here.
Kyle D. Pruett, M.D. is an advisor for The Goddard School®. Dr. Pruett is an authority on child development who has been practicing child and family psychiatry for over twenty-five years. He is a clinical professor of child psychiatry at Yale University’s Child Study Center.
Tags: 5 Star Child Care Centers, 5 star Preschools in Charlotte, 5-star Preschools, Back To School, Charlotte Preschools, Child Care Ballantyne, Child Care Centers Ballantyne, Child Care Centers Charlotte, Child Care Centers in Ballantyne, Child Care Centers in Charlotte, Child Care Charlotte, Child Development, Choosing a Preschool, Controlling Worrying in children, Fathering, Goddard, Goddard School, Learning through Play, Literacy, New School, Phonics, Preventing Biting, Role of Fathers, Saving Money, Staying Cool, Summer Games, The Goddard School, The Goddard School-Ballantyne, The Goddard Schoolol, Thumbsucking, Traveling Children, Worrying in Children
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