Archive for the ‘Tips’ Category

Positive Alternatives to “No”

Thursday, December 30th, 2010

Children should begin to learn to respect limits from a young age. Most boundaries for children are set for health and safety reasons and are a very important and necessary developmental tool. Children are corrected every day, which can lead them to simply “tune out” any perceived negativity or become uncooperative. Regardless of their age, most people respond better to positively communicated direction. This is especially true for children. For example, “Grandma is worried about us getting stains on her couch. Let’s enjoy our snack in her kitchen instead,” will generate more cooperation than “No food or drinks in Grandma’s living room.”

Try telling your child what they can do instead of what they can’t. Practice the positive alternatives below to avoid overusing the word “no” while maintaining reasonable limits.

  • “Maybe later” can work to delay a request such as snacks or sweets before mealtime.
  • “Not today” communicates that the timing is wrong but leaves the possibility open.
  • “When we’ve done (this), then we can do (that).” This method is good for transition times and to help toddlers establish event routines. For example, “When all of your toys are put away, we can go play at the park.”
  • “I’ll think about it” replaces an automatic “no” by allowing yourself the time to think about your determination. Parents tend to make better decisions when they take the time to think about the request and their response.
  • “Sure, did you bring your allowance?” This technique allows you to communicate that they may have the requested item if they can pay for it themselves.
  • “Yes (with qualifier).” This strategy grants conditional permission. For example, “Yes, you may play the game after we eat dinner.”

Going to the Dentist

Wednesday, December 1st, 2010

Many new parents wonder, “When should I take my child to the dentist for the first time?” According to the American Dental Association, your child should have their first dental visit by their first birthday, or sometime within six months of when they get their first tooth.

When looking for a dentist for your child, you may choose to go to your regular family dentist or a pediatric dentist. There are advantages to both, such as familiarity with your family dentist and specialized training for children with the pediatric dentist. The most important aspect to consider is that you and your child are comfortable with your choice. If you choose to find a pediatric dentist, it’s best to ask your family dentist for a recommendation or visit the American Academy of Pediatric Dentistry Web site for a list of pediatric dentists in your area.

During your child’s first visit, the dentist will speak with you in depth about your child’s overall health history, their oral health history (including teething, biting, thumb-sucking and feeding) and answer any questions you may have. Then, the dentist will examine your child’s teeth, gums, jaw and oral tissues. The dentist may also demonstrate the best way to clean your child’s teeth at home, provide information on what to expect as your child grows and offer suggestions for your child’s optimal oral health. Most dentists will wait until follow-up visits (within the next six months) to professionally clean and polish your child’s teeth, take x-rays and give a fluoride treatment.

The Importance of Nap Time

Thursday, November 18th, 2010

Your toddler shows all the signs that he is exhausted and in dire need of a good old-fashioned nap.  He is yawning, whining, rubbing his heavy eyelids and twirling his hair—but, at the mere mention of a nap, he just may melt down. The explanation is truly a simple one: Toddlers do not want to miss out on even one moment of adventure, as they are beginning to understand that they can assert their own independence as often as they like to manipulate the world around them.

The solution is not necessarily as straightforward. Here are a few tips for a more successful nap (or at least quiet) time:

  • Plan a quieter activity before nap time begins to allow for a winding down period.
  • Make the transition to nap time consistent each day: potty time, read a book, cuddle up with a lovey or special blanket.
  • Never make nap time a punishment.
  • Provide a restful place for nap time. (Consider: darkening blinds, heavy curtains, calming music, a fan or white noise machine)
  • Make sure naps are in his bed or crib. This will help him associate his own bed with sleep.
  • If he absolutely refuses to nap, leave him with some toys and books and tell him it’s quiet time.
  • Give him a hug and a kiss, tuck him in and leave the room.

Remember, sleep is very important for a growing child. If your child repeatedly gets up after you have tucked him in, calmly take his hand and return him to his bed. Walk him back to bed each time, and he will soon realize that you are serious. If he still seems to have difficulty napping, let him know it’s ok to stay awake, but he needs to use this time as “quiet time.” Be calm—but firm—about this resting period. Children (and parents, too!) need rest, even if they are not sleeping.

Thanksgiving and Giving Thanks

Friday, November 12th, 2010

We see our family and friends, eat too much pie, enjoy a few extra days off from school and work, but beyond that… How can we demonstrate to our children the importance of both Thanksgiving and giving thanks?

The first Thanksgiving. First, let’s start by making sure our children know the story of the first Thanksgiving. Pick up a developmentally-appropriate book or find information online. It is important to discuss this story of hardship, friendship and sharing in an age-appropriate way.

A new tradition. Establish a new family tradition revolving around what your family is thankful for. This Thanksgiving, have everyone write or draw what they are most thankful for. Together, decorate a shoebox or journal to everyone’s answers. Make a point of adding to this box or journal throughout the year, and by next Thanksgiving you will have an amazing record of thanks. Add to this year after year—what a great treat it will be for the family to read through each Thanksgiving as your children grow!

Share. What are some of the things your children are most thankful for?

Survival Tips for Returning to Work

Tuesday, November 9th, 2010

It’s the moment of truth. You are getting ready to go back to work. Maybe your maternity/paternity leave has come to an end or you took time off from your career to be a stay-at-home parent. In these economic times, you may have even been home due to unexpected circumstances. No matter the reason, juggling parenthood while reentering the workforce can be quite the challenge– just getting out the door in the morning can be a logistical nightmare! Here are some survival tips for the savvy parent.

Before You Go Back

A week before you go back to work, wake up at the new time and practice getting everybody ready. Do you need to get yourself ready before the rest of your household wakes? How long do you need? What can your children do while you are getting yourself ready? Will they play in a pack-n-play, feed themselves cereal, take care of their own potty needs or have cuddle time with your spouse? Make it a team effort and brainstorm with your spouse. Get specific about who will pack lunches, feed the children, pour the milk, give the vitamins, etc. Decide whether you will take turns or divvy up the responsibilities. Make sure you each have time to take care of your own needs, too. Hashing all of this out upfront and writing up a schedule will help you to figure out realistically how long it actually takes to get everybody ready in the morning, and then work your timeline backwards from when you’re due at work. Changing diapers, potty time, breakfast, getting dressed and tooth brushing may take a lot longer than you think! And be sure to leave plenty of extra time for traffic or the occasional extra-long good-bye with your child.

Start the Night Before

Pack up everything you and your child need for the next day before you go to bed: diaper bag, lunches, laptop bag, permission slips and bottles. Have the coffeemaker set to have that much needed java brewed and ready. If you weren’t a list maker before you had children, there is no better time than now to start! Jot down even the smallest of details and necessities that need to be packed or prepared. Sticky notes are a working parent’s best friend. Put a small bin in the fridge for each member of your family who packs breakfast, lunch or bottles and label with names.  Fill each bin with all lunch box items so in the morning you can just transfer the contents of each into a thermal bag with ice packs, etc. If something can’t be pre-packed, jot down a note and stick it in the bin so you know at a glance what is missing in the morning mayhem. Choose outfits the night before—if you are super savvy, you might even check the weather and select your children’s outfits for the whole week!

Back to the Grind

You may be shocked at how busy you will be when you go back to work. Plan time before or after work to spend with your children so you don’t feel like you are missing the details. Ease up on the idea of keeping the house clean 24/7. Your children won’t remember if the house was always sparkling clean or not, but they will remember the quality of the time they spent with you. Maximize your lunch breaks: go on a quick walk to boost your energy levels and be sure to pack healthful snacks. You may find it energizing to be back at work—you may be filled with new ideas, and be excited to spend your day with grown-ups! Don’t feel bad about leaving the office as soon as your workday officially ends–parenthood has taught you to be decidedly efficient, and to get more accomplished in less time. And, be sure to get as much sleep as possible–no matter how prepared and organized you are, going back to work and still maintaining a productive household can be exhausting!

You Deserve a Reward!

After all of the planning, organizing and hard work it takes to go back to the grind while also creating a happy and healthy work-life balance, treat yourself! Plan that rewarding lunchtime mani/pedi, a happy hour with your BFF or schedule some Saturday morning cuddle time with the little ones. You deserve it, and it will help reenergize you so you can do it all again next week.

Children Can Vote Too

Monday, November 1st, 2010

The Importance of Voting

Voting is one of the greatest privileges given to American citizens. American democracy depends on the participation of all its citizens to elect its officials. Speak out, take action, vote and involve yourself in the political system. Teach your children the values of democracy so they too will become responsible participants in the electoral process. As the election rapidly approaches, teach your children the values of the democratic system. Discuss the U.S. Constitution, Bill of Rights and the basic principals of justice, freedom, equality, diversity, privacy, tolerance, patriotism, civic responsibility and respect. No matter how young your children are, it is never too early to talk to them about the basic principals of being an American and the responsibility that comes with being a U.S. citizen. Discuss the candidates and the issues each nominee stands for in front of your children. Plant a seed of curiosity and interest as early as you can.

Involving Children

It is important to get your children involved in voting as early as you can. Draw parallels between family decisions and national elections. Allow your children to vote on what to have for dinner, snack, TV and radio selections or the allocation of chores. Allowing children to vote at an early age provides opportunities for critical thinking, analysis and debate. Invoke critical thinking and ask your children “What would you do if you were President? What rules would you make up? What problems do you want to solve?” This will allow your children to explore areas of democracy, society and basic human rights in a way they understand. Hold a pretend house helper election: Cookie Monster verses the Count. Help your children create slogans, posters and different ideologies for each candidate. Determine the pros and cons of each candidate with your children to invoke analysis. Discuss which candidate would be the most helpful and elicit debate among your family. Create a ballot box with your children and vote for the house helper.

Election Day

Give your children their first taste of democracy and take them with you to vote. No matter how young your children are, it is important to familiarize them with the process. Explain on the ride to the polling place that voting is a civic act that is extremely important to many people. Millions of people go to great lengths to vote; leaving their homes and places of work, despite the weather or other obstacles, to have their voices heard. When you arrive at the polling place, do not just put in your card, press a button and leave. Explain the process and its importance. Discuss what it means to you. If the voting area allows, take your children into the booth with you, where you can read and explain the ballot process to them. This can be an exciting new process for your children; let them put the ballot through the machine, punch the holes or simply hand it in. Celebrate your child’s civic participation and let them proudly wear the “I Voted” sticker. Treat election day as a great learning opportunity for you and your family. Discuss, participate, vote and celebrate. Happy voting!

VOTING ACTIVITIES

Introduce the concept of voting with age-appropriate activities:

Infant to One Year

✔ Select a favorite toy

First Steps (12 to 18 months)

✔ Learn party symbols of Donkey and Elephant

✔ Select a story to read

Toddler and Get Set (18 to 36 months)

✔ Vote on a game to play

✔ Vote for a favorite color

✔ Vote for a favorite food

✔ Select a food to eat

Preschool to Pre-K (36 months +)

✔ Conduct a mock election

✔ Identify Presidential candidates

Encouraging Good Table Manners

Monday, October 25th, 2010

With holiday meals soon to be in full swing, our younger diners may benefit from these simple tips for minding their manners when dining with others.

  • If the meal is not buffet style, wait until everyone has been seated and has their food before beginning to eat.
  • Place your napkin in your lap before beginning to eat and use it to dab your mouth, when necessary.
  • If you have to blow your nose or pick your teeth, excuse yourself to go to another room or restroom.
  • Always say “excuse me” should you burp.
  • If you don’t think you like something that is being served, try a bit and then move on to the rest of the food on your plate.
  • Always eat with utensils unless the food is meant to be eaten with fingers.
  • Do not put your elbows on the table. (This rule is okay to break if you’re not actually eating.)
  • Chew with your mouth closed and do not talk with your mouth full.
  • Always say “thank you” when you are served.
  • Politely ask that items out of reach be passed to you. Do not reach over other people’s plates.
  • Eat slowly.

Potty Training Tips

Monday, October 18th, 2010

1.)  Once your child shows behaviors of potty training and your child follows general instructions willingly, he/she is ready to learn and follow new instructions, like those for potty training.

Behaviors of Potty Training

  • Shows an interest in the bathroom
  • Can pull down and pull up his/her pants
  • Can walk over to and sit down on the toilet by themselves
  • Knows what “wet” and “dry” mean

2.)  It is important for your child to understand you are starting something new. Signal this big transition to your child by switching from diapers to training pants.

3.)  Give enthusiastic approval when instruction is followed: hugs, kisses and verbal praise.

4.)  Remember; never try to potty train a child during a time of stress, such as when your family is moving, going on vacation or when the child is sick. If it doesn’t seem to be working, take a break and try again in a few weeks or months. It will happen; just give it time.

Making a Difference in Your Community

Wednesday, August 4th, 2010

Commitment to family and community is characteristic of Goddard Schools.  We make a difference in our communities by participating in local sponsorship as well as charitable outreach programs.  The children in our schools learn about the importance of helping others and the significance of giving and being a part of their communities.

To build a foundation of good citizenship with your children, foster the essential skills of friendship, compassion, cooperation and kindness. Lead by example and teach your children the significance of helping others. Although there may be some limitations, children of almost every age can give back by participating in their communities every day:

  • Teach children to love and respect nature – plants, animals and even insects. It’s okay to catch crickets, butterflies and tadpoles as long as they are set free after a reasonable observation time.
  • Respect the property of others.  Be a good role model and remember to clean up after the family dog in your neighbor’s yard.
  • Protect the planet and encourage your children to recycle.
  • Your local library can be a great resource for community information. Ask the librarian if they have a list of community events and service organizations that are child friendly and in need of volunteers.

Look for ways to give back to your community that can empower your children.  Let them learn to create change in their own lives and the lives of others.

My daughter is currently cared for by my mom (her grandmother) while we are at work. I would like to move her to a center for a few days per week when she is 15 months old, mostly for additional stimulation and socialization. Can you please recommend steps we can take to make the transition the easiest on her?

Transitioning your child from home care to childcare is wrenching for every parent.  In fact, most babies and young children adapt to their new environment more easily than parents do.  And it’s important for parents to appreciate and care for their own emotions at this juncture.

As with so many things for young children, taking it slow and easy can work wonders.  If your child is moving into alternative childcare for the first time, make the transition gradual, providing lots of support.

  • Make sure your child meets the caregivers or teachers before moving into this new environment.  If you choose a childcare center or a preschool, make sure your child knows at least one other child in the class.  If your child doesn’t already know someone, ask the caregiver to suggest one or two children who might be good matches for your child, and set up a few play dates.
  • Talk to your child about the new arrangement, describing the friends to be made and the wonderful things to be done and learned.  Talk about being apart and getting back together.  Play games such as hide-and-seek that demonstrate being apart and together.
  • When moving to a new childcare arrangement, start gradually, if possible.  For example, allow your child to be alone at the childcare center for short periods at first, then slowly increase the time away from you.
  • Once the new arrangements are underway, get up a bit earlier so you have time together before you leave.  Also, make special family times in the evenings and on weekends.
  • Let your child take her favorite toy or “softie” to school.
  • Tell the caregiver or teacher of any factors that might influence your child’s behavior or needs for the day, such as a restless night, family illness or visits from relatives.
  • Be aware that separation anxiety may come and go in cycles.  You can ease your child’s upsets if you make your departure warm and smooth, staying long enough to let your child settle in, but without lingering.  And never sneak out or lie, telling your little one you “will be right back” just before you dash to the parking lot.  Your child needs to be able to rely on his trust in you as he navigates this new world.
  • When you pick your child up, ask the caregiver about what happened during the day.  Then discuss the day’s events with your child.